Is it really that bad to marry for money? Here's what a top relationship expert says

Plus, 9 proven tips to find "the one."

Hello friends!

If you haven’t seen Celine Song’s new movie Materialists, you’re missing out on the conversation topic of the summer. I won’t spoil it for you, but I will say that it’s packed with fascinating, controversial takes on our modern dating landscape.

With everyone talking about it, I decided this was the perfect time to bring my dear friend Logan Ury to the podcast. Logan is a Harvard-trained behavioral scientist and the author of the bestselling book How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love. She serves as the Director of Relationship Science at Hinge, where she conducts groundbreaking research on modern dating trends, and she’s the dating coach on the popular Netflix series The Later Dater. She also writes the widely-read Logan’s Love Letter newsletter, which reaches more than 90,000 subscribers each week. Most recently, she’s entered the world of matchmaking—a timely move given how central matchmaking is to Materialists.

Logan and I cover a lot of interesting ground, much of which touches on how to meet “the one”—but I also asked her a question I think so many people are afraid to ask, and I found her answer completely fascinating:

Is it ok to marry for money?

Yes, money—not love. Logan has some interesting thoughts on this question.

💰 No, there is nothing inherently “wrong” with marrying for money

Logan’s take: There’s no one “right” reason to marry. Plenty of people are drawn to partners for stability, ambition, or shared life goals like financial comfort. But while those things might start a relationship, they’re rarely what sustains it over the long haul.

🤝 The couples who last are the ones who stay friends

Across her research and coaching, Logan has found one common thread in lasting relationships: friendship. Do you genuinely enjoy each other’s company? Do you laugh together, talk about ideas, and support each other’s growth? Those small, everyday moments of connection build the kind of bond money alone can’t buy.

⚠️ Without friendship, resentment can quietly grow

If a relationship is built only on practical goals—like financial stability—it might look good on paper, but Logan warns it can lead to emotional distance. Over time, the lack of true intimacy can breed resentment and disconnection. The real flex? A partnership where comfort and chemistry coexist.

From the episode:

“I think about the idea of a life partner versus a prom date. A prom date is someone who looks good in pictures. You want to dance the night away with them, you have a crush on them, they’re so much fun… but will they pick up your kids from the dentist? If you had an aging parent, would you trust them to make a hard decision with you? Are they reliable? So often people have a hard time making this shift, but it's important to find a life partner and not just a prom date.”

The takeaway:

There’s nothing wrong with wanting financial stability in a relationship, but don’t forget to build the foundation that actually lasts. Ask yourself: Do I truly enjoy being around this person? Do we invest in each other emotionally, not just practically? Prioritize friendship alongside your life goals. That’s what keeps love strong long after the honeymoon (or the paycheck) wears off.

For more from Logan, including her advice on how to stop “relation-shopping,” why we’re often wrong about what we think we want, and the practical dating filters you should probably change right now, listen to today’s episode of The Liz Moody Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or YouTube.

Love you guys!

Xo,
Liz

P.S. Paying subscribers always get a list of episode takeaways, along with the full episode transcript. Plus, every Friday, we dive into fun and fascinating topics—this week, we’re tackling the pressing subject of how bad food dyes really are for us. I think you’ll find the answer really interesting!

Key takeaways